We are only 3 days into the New Year and already I have heard people talk about their resolution to lose weight, get out of debt and even be a better person. I have seen and read blogs about word of the year and phrase of the year and they have all be inspiring and touching. It led me to realize I don’t make resolutions because frankly I break them as quickly as I make them. But I do like having a word or phrase for the year.
A few years back I chose the word fearless as my word and it really was great. during that year I tried so many new things. From rock climbing to zip lining. So i thought why not try it again. Now before you laugh thinking I’m some sort of weeping willow that jumps at her own shadow that’s not the point of this word. You see I’m not afraid of the unknown or anything like that. In fact I live for new experience and trying anything new and exciting. However I do have a fear of letting people in.
You see I think being diagnosed at 17 with end stage renal failure, then at 24 slipping into a coma and being diagnose with MS. Plus spending the last 20 some odd years fighting an endless medical battle has stripped me of the fear of the unknown. I basically live in the moment and will do or try anything with no fear, but in it’s place it has given me a fear of letting others in for fear of hurting them. I have built walls stronger than Alcatraz. No one gets in not even with a secret word or magically key.
It’s tough to admit but I can handle most things in life because I live in the moment. Want me to skydive bring it on, dance on tables okay, or write a blog and let people judge me no problem I can do that but ask me to let someone get close and I panic. I can think of a hundred ways to make a person leave.
I tell people that the fact that my husband is still around after 26 years only proves two things. One he is truly crazy in love and two he must be a saint because I am no prize to be had.
So yeah my word this year is fearless. I not only want to continue to be fearless in life and meet every new experience with full on excitement. I want to continue to live life in the moment to the fullest and to experience new things. But most importantly I want to be fearless in my ability to love and be loved. To be fearless is my goal this year as silly as that sounds it is what I am working towards.
Let’s Talk: What is your word of the year or phrase?