The Lucky One. I can not count how many times people have said to me you’re a lucky one. Your lucky to have survived, your lucky to be here or your lucky to be in the place you are now. Don’t get me wrong I feel blessed, grateful and even a little every day I wake up but I also know how much work and willpower it takes to be here.
Earlier this year I came clean about having MS. It was a hard choice to make because I knew once I say it out loud I couldn’t take it back. I could no longer hide behind bad jokes. The thing is there is more to this story than me just having MS.
My life of living with medical issues began in my teens. I was diagnosed with renal failure at the young age of 18 and told I would not see the age of 21. Life, as I knew it in the moment I was diagnosed, would completely change. As I came to terms with this devastating news I also resolved not to let it define me. So my battle began.
It would be 5 years later that I would be in what I called my self-indulgent stage of mine. I had convinced myself I had beat the odds and that I had life figured out. After all at 24 don’t we all think we know everything? It would be this precise moment that the universe would shake up my life much like you would shake a snow globe. everything I had thought I knew would turn upside down and inside out as my life would once again shatter apart.
Life in Pieces
April 5, 1995, a day that would live forever in my mind. It would start like most of my days with a grateful heart and a blessing of thanks for another day. It would end with me being in the hospital. My body had finally rebelled and let be known it no longer was going to live in silent but shout rather loudly that it had MS. Life for me would again be turned upside down and be shattered into a million pieces as I slipped into a coma and into a world of darkness for 2 weeks. The Ms was determined it was going to win this battle. Doctors told my family I would not make it through the next 48 hours I would in fact not only make it but I would eventually awaken from the coma.
Waking up I would find that nothing was as it was prior to coma. The littlest of a task would now seem like a mountain to climb. Things that most people take for granted like breathing were now being down for me by machines and tubes. It would be days, weeks and months before I would even be able to brush my teeth without assistance.
Putting the pieces of my life and body back together only served to make me realize that the road ahead would be anything but smooth. Eventually, I would leave the hospital and return home but it would not be the same. As I worked to make my body do as I needed it to do the MS would flare and tell me no. The battle would rage for years some days I win and some days my body wins. Neither of us gives in or give up.
The Lucky One
So yeah when people tell me I’m lucky I smile and nod because I know it’s more than luck that has gotten me where I am today. It has taken hard work, determination and a strong will to survive. My life is a series of highs and lows. In the 22 years that followed that fated day, I have experienced the greatest of joys like the birth of my son to the lowest of lows the loss of a child. To say I am lucky is an understatement for I am blessed and grateful to still be standing.
Let’s Talk: When people say the phrase the Lucky One what do think of?
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