Relationships – When Things Get Too Much, It’s ok to take Time Out.

Taking a time out from your stressful life can be a godsend. If you do not take a time out, conflict can brew between you and your partner which could end in a nasty divorce. I am sure that all of us have experienced some amount of conflict with our partner at one time or another. And if conflict does arise, it is good to know that there are many resources for couples counselling these days. However, the question remains, how can conflict ever be avoided?

Taking a time out may be the simplest answer but the fact is, it is not that easy. For starters, the very nature of the work we do means that we have to put our own needs and feelings on the back foot. It’s no good pretending that you don’t care about your partner’s feelings when you know that you do and you really should. If you have any regrets at all about a regrettable incident that has happened in the past, it is important to remember that regret is something that you can never remove. You could say that regret is a part of life; you only have to remember that it is part of every regret whether it was a regrettable incident that was your fault or a regrettable incident which was the fault of someone else.

Taking a break from work and diverting your attention towards your partner, family and friends can help you calm down and relax. This is especially true if you are having a particularly difficult week at work due to a clash between your boss and you. By taking a break from work, you will be able to calm down and address your conflict in a calmer manner. By distracting yourself, you will also be less likely to feel the affects of stress, tension and frustration which are commonly associated with conflict.

Taking a health break can also be useful if you are feeling run-down or fatigued. By leaving work and indulging yourself for a short while, you can revitalise your energy and give your body a rest from the rigors of daily work. By relieving your body of stress and tension, you can also lessen the affects of any stress-related health conditions that you may be suffering from such as headaches, stomach problems and stress-related insomnia. Again, by diverting your attention away from the conflict, you can refresh your mind and body enough to feel more in-tune with your body and with your interactions with others.

Finally, it should be noted that the above situations can also be used to treat an existing addiction to drugs or alcohol. If you use drugs and alcohol on a regular basis, you may find that even after taking a time-out, the symptoms will still be present. However, they will be much weaker and less likely to cause harm to your health or feelings. The same can be said for any other addiction that you suffer from such as smoking, gambling or eating too much. By eliminating any addictive behaviour patterns which you experience by taking a time-out, you can help strengthen your ability to resist the temptations to return to your problem habits.

Whether the circumstances that triggered your climactic mishap were entirely foreseeable or whether they were a regrettable incident which you felt you had to confront head-on, it is important to acknowledge them and deal with them properly. Never blame your partner, and accept whatever responsibility you have in resolving the situation. Holding anger or resentment towards your partner at this time will only compound the situation and make the cure more difficult. You can choose to talk things through with your partner, or you can accept that it will be best if you end the relationship and move on. Whichever decision you make, remember that a breakup is usually hard for everyone, but when you are dealing with feelings of betrayal, it is even harder.

Zoe Kickhefer
zoe@everydaylifes.com